I've became numb to departures

So tomorrow's my last day in KTJ. To be frank, I don't feel anything that I was anticipating for the past 3 months, the sadness, the tears and all. The most that I feel is the reluctance in parting with our friends. Deep down in us, we know that we might not see each other forever, but it just feels nothing much than a simple departure! For me, it feels something like, "well she's gonna be back right!". Or in other case, though I know that I'll be leaving tomorrow, but it felt like " What's the big deal, I always go home and I'll be back anytime!" I guess the sadness starts when one day you realize that something's different in a part of your life. Just like Adam said before, he felt weird waking up finding himself not in his boarding house. Indeed, no more waking up in Alia, no more lunch with Umi and friends at 12:30, no more prep time, no more Miss coming in to my room switching off my lights at 11:30, no more sneaking out to friends room in the middle of the night after 11pm for movies or girl talk. No more house night, no more house meeting, and most of all, no more uniform. 

I used to fear of leaving each other, but now and then, I don't anymore. No reason can explain it now. Umi just left just now but I didn't shed a single tear. I'm not sure whether if I was already numb and psychologically ready to face all this, or I was just trying hard to hold it back. One thing I know is, I did feel reluctant. I've been pretty close to Umi for about a year and most importantly we have our meals together, at least every dinner. She's sometimes unpredictable, but a very funny friend. I swear she can make the most epic jokes that will laugh my heart out. AND SHE WATCHES DISNEY CARTOONS AND AVATAR!!! as in...the last air bender...not James Cameron's blue people....Besides, I miss her sharing Evelyn's sarcasm and trying to pronounce Evelyn's chinese name xD

Whether if I'll cry tomorrow or not has became a question now instead of a matter of fact. But one thing for sure is that I WILL CRY if I see my friends start crying. That's just me. Guess that's all for the moment, toodles!