Ranting in a boring midnight

I see everybody's been posting pretty "deep" blogs recently, so am I gonna make one right now. Besides, the atmosphere is perfect right now. 2am on a Saturday midnight, everyone's back to hometown. The night is plain quiet. Not a single sound could be heard. It's like something's blocking between and all the sounds going on out there. Except for the folk radio on Myspace, the typing sound and the fan sound. 2am in my PJ and nerdy glasses in front of my lappie trying to be poetic in this silent night, what else could I ask for?

I'm bored. And I would be more than happy to declare that.

But other than this I can hardly say anything else. I know I'm busy. I know this is not good for my health. I know I have things to be accomplished and I have to accomplish it tomorrow if possible so I should be having sufficient sleep. But I'm not doing it. I'm going exactly the opposite way.

It's empty inside me. For the past 3 indescribably boring weekend, I like other time been trying to acquire as much knowledge as I could outside of my country. I saw stuff happening in New York, LA, I learnt science, anatomy and invaluable moral lessons from Bones. I learnt how to identify what's a good movie, what's a bad movie to watch. I traveled to Rome in To Rome with Love. But still, the problem is still there. I'm not applying it in any way. And yet, problems right in front of me awaiting for me to solve are still yet to be solved. They pile up.

This is exactly where my problem lies. I put the puzzles of all my dreams and desires together and I could start identifying the direction that I am heading. But I'm sort of leaving out 10 years in the middle. I want to travel and learn the little things, I wanna be part of UNICEF and help those kids when I'm financially stable. I want to have a beautiful house and a beautiful family. But yet I'm here screwing my own health with undone assignments and tutorials. Do those dots connect? It's like I'm dreaming of the day I could fly to the moon with my own wings and live there eternally. That sounds impossible right?

I'm just ranting and wasting my time. This is unhealthy. I'm out.